“You cannot expect to live a positive life if you hang with negative people.” ~Joel Osteen
How do you deal with those negative people that keep showing up in your life?
I have come to believe that nothing in this world happens by accident and that there is a lesson to learn from everything and everyone.
“What is a good man but a bad man’s teacher? What is a bad man but a good man’s job? If you don’t understand this, you will get lost, however intelligent you are. It is the great secret.” ~ Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching
Well, apparently I don’t always walk the talk. I have to confess to you that I have times when I feel like I can’t take it anymore. There are people who know exactly what buttons to push, how to push them and when to push them. I am not perfect. When it happens it’s like I can’t think clear anymore and I forget everything I stand for, everything I believe in. It lasts for a while but then I go back to who I really am and what I really want my life to look like.
“How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.” ~Wayne Dyer
It can be hard sometimes, it can be overwhelming but you can do it. Those people that keep showing up in your life, they are there because that’s exactly where they have to be and you need to accept that and you need to look for the lesson.
If you like games, and I know most of you do, you will start having a lot of fun on this journey called life, on this process. When something negative is happening to you, when something terrible is coming your way, when somebody at work, or at home, or on the street is really trying to make your life harder, look for the lesson.
Those are the people who are here to teach you something, those are your teachers and if you don’t master the lesson you won’t be able to move forward in life and you will keep experiencing the same problems over and over again. You will keep attracting the same people and the same circumstances that make you feel so mad, so angry, so frustrated.
There are a lot of people out there who hate their jobs, hate their lives, people who lack self-esteem and they are trying to do everything they can to make the lives of those around them miserable too. When you are confronted with people like this, don’t let them get to you. Always remember to look for the lesson.
Try to see why is it that they act the way they do. Nobody is evil because they love to be evil. I discovered that those people who are constantly looking for ways to hurt those around them are people who are in a great deal of pain, people who have suffered and are still suffering. People who have no love for themselves and people who see themselves as being worthless and of no value.
It is a mask that they wear, a mask to protect themselves from more suffering. Because they don’t want to experience more pain, they act in ways that are pushing the people around them away. They act in ways that others find repulsive, unorthodox and self-destructive. It is easier for us to judge and reject than to understand and empathize with them. People can’t seem to understand that nobody really enjoys this kind of behavior. It is all an act, a mask.
And if you think you can’t do this, if you think you can’t understand their actions and behaviors, if you don’t want to understand it, then try to smile politely. Smile and don’t allow their toxic energy to get to you.
Don’t allow them to make their problems your problems. Don’t allow them to make their frustration and unhappiness your unhappiness. You have to be aware of the fact that it’s not about you, it’s all about them and how they are really feeling on the inside, how lonely, sad, unhappy and frustrated with everything that happened and is still happening to them.
“Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.” ~Anthony J. D’Angelo
They feed with your energy, they are energy vampires and if you show them that you are affected, they will take advantage of you and they will take away all your power, all your energy in no time.
This kind of people will show up in your life over and over again, there is no end to them and this is why you have to learn how to deal with them, how to respond to them and how not to allow them to affect you. It is all in the way we choose to look at things, people and situation that will make us feel frustrated, depressed, worried or positive, energized, powerful, blissful and worthy.
“Don’t take anything Personally Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering” ~ Miguel Ruiz