Perfect love casts out fear. If fear exists, then there is not perfect love. ~ A Course in Miracles
Hard Truths About Love
People go around throwing I love you’s as if these words are nothing. And when it comes to honoring their words with actions, a lot of them have absolutely nothing to show for… And
Today I will share with you 10 hard truths about love that can improve not just our relationships, but also our lives, and the whole world.
1. There is no love without self-love
Pay close attention to those people who tell you how much they love you, but who treat themselves as if there is nothing worthy about them. If a person has no love for themselves, they will have no love to offer to those around. How can anyone offer you something they themselves don’t have? It’s just not possible.
“I don’t trust people who don’t love themselves and tell me, ‘I love you.’ … There is an African saying which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt.” ~ Maya Angelou
2. Love is not selective
I used to be so proud of the fact that I had love only for a selective few. And in my ignorance, I failed to realize that my love was flawed and imperfect. Because just as the Eckhart Tolle so beautifully said it,
“Love is not selective, just as the light of the sun is not selective. It does not make one person special. It is not exclusive. Exclusivity is not the love of God but the “love” of ego. However, the intensity with which true love is felt can vary.”
3. Codependency is not love
4. Love is not blind infatuation
You often hear people say things like: Oh my God, I fell in love! I’m so happy. And then after a little while, the same people will affirm: Oh, I’m so unhappy. I no longer love them. I fell out of love… But the truth of the matter is that what these people felt wasn’t love, but rather a blind infatuation that lasted for a little while and then it disappeared. Because that’s what infatuation does – it comes and goes.
5. Love is eternal
Love isn’t something you fall in, and out of. Love just is. Love is eternal and always present. And iIf there’s true and honest love in your heart for someone, this love will remain with you for as long as you live. And whether you allow this love to be felt or not, that is your choice.
6. Love is not blind, or foolish
Love is not foolish, and love is not blind. Love will not permit us to be walked all over by those we love.
If somebody you love treats you in toxic and unkind ways, out of love for them and yourself, you will be guided intuitively to do what’s right – by either removing yourself from the toxic relationship or by asking them to change and correct their ways – but under no circumstances will love ask you to stay in a relationship where you will be abused, manipulated, and mistreated. So keep that in mind.
7. Love is to be offered to all
8. Love needs nothing in return
If you think you have a right to receive just because you have given your love to others, that is a clear sign your love is flawed and imperfect. Because love is pure and unconditional. It offers itself to the whole world without wanting anything in return. And even though we were taught to believe that we should only offer our love only to those who offer their love to us, we should never forget that true love comes with no conditions.
9. The word Love has become empty of meaning, but love itself has never lost its power
We go around throwing “I love you’s” as if love was nothing. But love is not, nothing. Love is everything. Love is the Source of all things. Love is what we all need, what we all seek, and what we all need. And even though the word love has become empty of meaning through years and years of misuse, love itself has never lost its value and its power.
10. Love isn’t what we think it is
And these are 10 hard truths about love we should all know. What about you? What is one hard truth about love that you’ve learned and made your life better? You can share your comment in the comment section below.
Luminita, the Founder of PurposeFairy, is an enthusiastic student of the arts, psychology, and spirituality. Her acclaimed blog post, 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy , was shared by over 1.3 million people on Facebook. Later on, it became the heart of her book, 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy., book that was published by Penguin Random House. For more details check out the 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy Book Page.